Unequivalent Exchange
by Maryyy13
Summary: Post-Promised Day! Al has a plan to get Ed his alchemy back and things don't go as expected.
1. Chapter 1

Okay so so this is my first ever story so pleeaaassee comment and tell me what you think. Regardless, I will be posting updates and regular as I can remember to do! Thanks a lot and hope you enjoy!

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It wasn't that Edward didn't love his brother or hat he didn't appreciate what he was trying to do, but as Al told him his plan, Ed couldn't help but wonder what in the _everliving_ _Hell_ his brother was thinking

"Al..."

"I know, I know Brother, but I listen! I think this is totally possible!"

"I just don't think it's a good idea..."

"But don't you want your alchemy back?"

"Of course!" Ed shot back, "Just not this way."

It physically hurt Edward to see Alphonse's expression fall. He was so excited. There was transmutation circle ready and everything. It was just _such_ a bad idea

There was no way it would work

"Ed, I don't think there is another way."

"Then it won't happen! I'll just remain alchemy-less."

"You've been complaining about not having alchemy for months!" Al said, anger starting to form in his eyes. He tightened his fists, _real human fists,_ Ed thought. "Why are you so stubborn to not help yourself?"

"Why are you so stubborn to put yourself in danger?"

"Brother, nothing is going to happen to me!"

"You. Don't. Know. That."

Ed was about done with this conversation. He couldn't put Alphonse in any situation where he might get hurt. Not now. Not after last year. Not after all they'd been through.

"Look, Al, we have come so far to get your body back. Why would you risk it?"

"Because I don't want it anymore!"

"Want what?"

 _"MY ALCHEMY"_

 _"What do you mean you don't want your alchemy?"_

Silence

No, this was not happening. Ever since Ed had given up his alchemy at the Promised Day, he had missed his alchemy. He couldn't do anything anymore. He had to give up his position in the military. And God knows he is too lazy to ever do anything the long way. Alchemy had been a part of him for years and he had trained day in and day out to use it to get his brother his body back. And just like that, it was gone

He never regretted it, though. He would give it up ten fold to have Alphonse with him again. And now Alphonse was here and he didn't want what he had. Alphonse had made this big talk about getting in alkhestry with Mei and using it to heal people. What happened to that?

But regardless of Al's wishes, Ed wasn't gonna take it from him Al didn't know what it was like to not be able to rely on it. And there was no way there was a safe process of transferring it, if that was even possible. Al wanted to try transmuting it to Ed, but Ed couldn't do that.

No more human transformations. That's what they had said. And now, Al was breaking that promise to give him something he wanted so bad.

He he just couldn't take it.

Edward turned away. He couldn't bear to bring his eyes up to Al's

"Ed... this is your chance to have it all back! I've tried helping people with my alchemy... with alkahestry... I'm just not good at it but you- you could really help people.

That's why I want you to have my alchemy Ed. I want to give it to you cuz you're better at this than me. I've seen you help so many people and you can do it again! You've just been so depressed without your alchemy and- well I can't live with knowing you don't have it because of me! I don't want it if you can't have it! And hear thoughts have ruined my performance - I can't perform any transmutations successfully! It's just been a huge waste!

But t won't be if you let me do this!"

Ed looked up slowly at his still taller-than-him brother and saw Al was crying. _Dammit,_ Ed didn't want to start crying too.

Al took his hand.

"You already gave me my body back. Now it's time to give you something back too."

"No, Al" Ed said finally.

"Ed, nothing is going to happen! It's equivalent exchange!"

"Equivalent exchange my ass! When has anything ever been equal!"

"This will be different! Please, Brother! Let me do this!"

Al was immovable. Ed had the sneaking suspicion that even if he said no, Al would do it behind his back when he was sleeping or something

 _Dammit_

He caved

"Fine, but if this transmutation backfires, I'm gonna kill you."

"No worries Brother!"

Al led his brother to the center of the circle. He gave him his signature red coat. He wanted Ed to have it when he got his alchemy back.

He mentally readied himself to see the Truth again. For, of course, it was Truth that he would have to talk to in order to give Ed his alchemy gate.

But then it would be over.

And everything would be perfect

"Al, are you sure-"

Ed was cut off as Al clapped his hands together and brought them down to the circle.

Ed saw the flashing of blue light. It wrapped around the circle and hen wrapped around him. He felt the energy coming off of it and it _hurt_. It felt worse than getting his auto mail connected. He let out a strangled cry before his brother seemed to vanish before him - "AL!" - and he fell into a dark pit of nothingness.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay so I'm finally updating! I have to say, I wasn't expecting to really get any views for this since it's my first one so thanks to all who are following this! Big thanks to those who commented! I have a lot of good ideas for future chapters, so please stick around to see where this goes.

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Ed heard the voice first. A sort of laughing that sent a sudden chill down his spine. It was the voice of someone he had met before.

The Truth.

Suddenly, there was no more darkness, and he was standing in an all too familiar white void. He was alone besides the black outline of a person in front of him. He would never forget the creepy smile that faced him.

 _"Well, well, well, if it isn't Edward Elric back again"_

Ed clinched his fists and gritted his teeth. Everything in his being was telling him to lunge forward and pound the Truth into nothingness. But he knew that would do no good.

"I assume you know why I'm here."

 _"Oh yes, your brother's alchemy"_

As if in cue, a giant gateway started to form behind the shadowy figure. It looked just as Ed had pictured it. It stood giant and menacing, holding secrets Ed didn't ever need to see again. He just wanted the gate because it would allow him to do what he lived and breathed - alchemy.

He could almost feel electricity in the air as it formed, as if alchemy was forming the gate. Of course, Truth didn't use alchemy. It was just the Truth, and there was no better way to explain or understand it.

Ed stepped forward towards the newly formed gate but was stopped by the Truth.

 _"nuh uhh uh, not so fast Edward Elric. The gate will come at a price. Equivalent exchange must be maintained"_

Ed furrowed his brow.

"No, that's not how this is gonna work this time and you know it!" Ed knew this was coming but it didn't make him any less pissed. "Al lost his alchemy and I'm gaining it. He's giving it to me. We aren't exchanging anything!"

 _"But you see, that's where you're wrong. Al lost his alchemy. Alchemy is his gift to you, and his price was losing it. But you are gaining alchemy, so you must give something up in order to maintain balance."_

"Bullshit!"

The grin on the shadow seemed to deepen. The creepiness was going off the charts.

Ed shifted uneasily. He wasn't getting out of this

 _Damn_

He had expected as much. His life never went as planned.

"What do you want?"

 _"What's rightfully mine"_

There was a long silence. The tension in the room could be cut with a knife. Ed knew what it wanted. He would give it up for the alchemy, but he was really hoping to avoid it. Because what it wanted was the whole reason they had started their quest, in part anyway. And Al was gonna kill him.

"You want my arm back" he said finally.

The Truth didn't say anything.

Ed nodded and looked at his arm. It had been Al's sacrifice to him. Al had given his soul up for that arm. Luckily, Ed had gotten him back, but Al didn't know for sure that he would come back. Al could've been los forever. This arm represented Al's love. It represented his trust. This arm meant a lot to Ed.

But the alchemy was a gift too. A sacrifice almost as big. A risk taken when neither of them knew what the Truth would require them to give up. Al seemed to have been spared from any further pain, but this?

This was hard to give up.

Ed made a fist with his hand. Felt ever muscle in that arm tighten. Felt it all for the last time.

He sighed. Here goes nothing.

He walked forward, past Truth. He didn't look at him or look anywhere besides right at the gate. He stopped right in front of it and waited. The worst was yet to come.

The gate opened and he felt himself be sucked in. He saw what he saw the first time he went through it

Images flashed in front of him. Memories of a life he could never go back to. Possibilities of futures that would never happen. Instructions to processes that weren't even invented yet. Ways to make the impossible possible. Formulas to making the perfect life. Yes, even the secret to human transmutation, something Ed now knew was never worth the price.

It was all there right in front of him. And Ed knew it, he was expecting it this time. But it still was too much. His brain couldn't handle it. He didn't understand. His body felt like it might explode.

And how long had he been falling? It must have only been a couple minutes but it felt like hours - days.

And, like before, there was a moment where it all made sense

And then he was back in the white void, the gate slamming shut.

"Dammit!"

Ed slammed his fist into the door to the gate, but he knew it was no use. His body felt numb, his brain mush. Everything felt like it was vibrating, and the silence in the room was so loud it hurt.

The Truth still didn't say anything. It didn't have to. Ed knew what came next. His arm started going numb. He looked at it, and saw it start to disintegrate. He watched his arm disappear all the way up to his shoulder. It had scared him the first time. He didn't want to admit it, but it still made him uneasy.

Ed felt like he was gonna throw up.

The Truth just watched and then Ed heard it again. That maniacal laughing. It filled his head til that was all he could hear. Until it was all there was - no room, no gate, nothing but laughter.

Then Ed felt the pain. In an instant he was back in the real world. He was still in the middle of the transmutation circle, but he was no longer standing. He was laying on the ground. Someone was yelling his name.

 _Al?_

His body was cold but he was in something warm.

 _Blood_

 _Dammit_

His brother's face swam into view. Ed actually let out a sigh of relief of seeing that his brother was still in one piece. He was still Al and not a suit of armor again.

"Brother!" Al yelled. He was crying very heavily. "Brother, I'm so sorry! I thought it would work! I'm sorry!"

"It's okay... Al" Ed struggled to say. "It worked... it really did... I saw the Truth"

Al looked up. His crying didn't stop but the light of hope in his eyes brightened ever so slightly.

"But your arm..."

"Is gone... equivalent exchange and all that bullshit... but it's okay... nothing I haven't faced before..."

...

*Yeah it's okay... * Ed thought, pushing the disappointment of losing the arm back to the recesses of his mind, where he kept all his disappointments and guilt. Don't let anyone see them, ya know?

Al's face started to waver as blackness crowded the edges of Ed's vision.

" ... but Al? You may wanna get me to a doctor... before I...

...bleed to death..."

The blood loss finally got to Ed as he passed out in Al's lap - leaving a very worried little brother to deal with the aftermath of everything.


	3. Chapter 3

After a lot of worry and tears, Al got Ed to the hospital along with Winry and Pinako. Explaining what they had done to them had been a complete nightmare, he'd practically had a mental breakdown. But, he couldn't carry Ed by himself anymore since he was human, so they transported him together.

It was touch and go for a while, but they finally stabilized him.

Al felt a weight in the pit of his stomach. This was all his fault. It had been his idea to do the transmutation. He understood now how guilty Ed must have been the first time around. He felt absolutely awful and Ed hadn't even lost his whole body.

"Stop looking at me like that" a weak voice said.

"BROTHER!" Al nearly fell over in his chair when he heard his Ed's voice. He sprung out from where he was sitting and was at the bed in mere seconds. "How do you feel? Are you okay?"

"I feel like crap but… I'm okay."

"No you're not, you nearly died!"

"Yeah, well I didn't – so it's fine…"

There was a long silence. Neither brother really wanted to break it, because neither wanted to have the conversation they both knew they needed to. It wasn't until Al started fiddling with Ed's blankets did Ed say anything.

"So, you're fine right? The truth didn't take anything from you?"

"No… I just said I wanted to give up my alchemy to you and he started laughing. I knew at that moment that I'd done something terribly wrong, but I was too late… I'm so sorry"

"It's fine. I didn't that arm anyway. I just needed you to be okay." Ed smiled half heartedly, "Ya know, as long as you aren't a suit of armor, I think we're okay." Al didn't laugh. "But, Al, I think there's more. I'm glad to have alchemy back, but I don't know, I just have a bad feeling about this whole thing. There's gotta be a catch."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, when I was negotiating, the Truth said that it wanted what was his. I assumed it meant my arm, but he never directly confirmed it."

"I think the fact that you no longer have an arm is confirmation enough"

"I dunno, Al. I just think we should be prepared for anything to happen. I know my arm belonged to him, but so could so many other things. What if he wants to regain everything he had taken in the past? That would include your body… Or maybe he meant something else. I just don't know and I don't trust it."

"Stop it, Ed" Al said, suddenly feeling like someone had dumped ice water on him. "I understand what you're saying, but… you have to be wrong. I'm still me. I still have my body. Don't' worry, nothing else is gonna happen."

Ed sighed. There was nothing he could do about it now. He looked at his stump of a shoulder. He knew what was gonna happen next. He would have to tell Winry everything and get new automail. He have to connect the wires to a port in his arm (He was NOT looking forward to that) and then spend the next few months training his muscles. He hoped it wouldn't take as long this time since he'd already done it before, but there was no telling how his body would respond.

As if on cue, Winry burst through the doors, Pinako yelling at one of the doctors behind her. 

"ED! HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME WORRY ABOUT YOU AGAIN! I THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH THIS TYPE OF BEHAVIOR WHEN YOU LOST YOUR ALCHEMY!"

Ed sunk back in his bed, trying to hide under his blanket. He did not need a wrench coming down on his head. When he didn't hear yelling anymore, he poked his head back out to see a crying Winry in front of him

 _Great_.

"I knew you were depressed, I just didn't realize you'd resort to this… I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me" 

_Damn it._

"It's not your fault. We were never gonna work out anyway. That's not why I did this. It didn't have anything to do with… us."

"Then why did you do it?" 

"Because I asked him to." Al said sadly. He looked like he was on the verge of crying. And that shut everybody up.

No one talked until someone knocked at the door. The doctor came in. He was an older man, with gray peppering his dark hair. He was short and stocky, but he had a kind face. He help a clipboard that obviously had Ed's chart on it. He didn't look too happy about what he was about to have to say.

"We're gonna need to take Edward into surgery now. We need to perform the procedure as soon as possible so that we can attach the automail port with as few complications as possible. He will need to be awake so that we can make sure the nerves are still intact because we will be giving you a set of automail as well"

Ed shuddered. He remembered this the first time. He thought he'd throw up in the middle of the procedure. He didn't know how he was gonna make it through again. But he put on his brave face and nodded. Better now than later.

"Who do you want to come with you?"

Ed knew Al would want to come, but he didn't want his brother to see him in so much pain. He frowned, but finally decided that Pinako should come with him. He could allow himself to fall apart in front of her, and he definitely would during this procedure.

He moved to the portable bed and laid down. He sat as still as possible as they put a cloth over his eyes and gave him a towel to bite down on. He felt them moving him throughout the hospital. When they got to the room where the surgery would be held, he held out his one hand so that Pinako could take it.

"Hey old lady" Ed said, "Please, whatever happens in here, don't tell Al. It'll break his heart. He already feels guilty."

He felt her hand grip his and give it a squeeze. She didn't say anything because she didn't need to. Besdies, the procedure was starting, and she needed to prepare herself for what Ed was about to have to deal with.

As soon as the first cut was made, Ed's body tensed up. His breathing intensified.

"This is gonna hurt, brace yourself"

He nodded, but he wasn't prepared. Suddenly, his whole side was one fire. He couldn't hear anything, but he could tell he was screaming. It was taking everything in his power to not jerk away from the doctor.

Pinako's hand squeezed his again. He squeezed back with all his might. He was probably breaking the bones in her hand, but he didn't care. He needed to pain to stop. He felt bile creeping up the back of his throat. He choked it down, but if it came up again, there was not stopping it.

It went on for over an hour before it ended, and by that time, Ed had no vocal cord left. His face was slick with tears, but when he looked at his new arm, he felt relief.

"We're done here. Take him back, and make sure he gets some rest."

They didn't have to tell Ed twice. As soon as he was wheeled out of the room, he passed out, welcoming the peaceful darkness with open arms.


End file.
